i love you. tonight and for the last few nights i've been asking myself some very scary questions, and most without answers. some things you can't question, you just have to live and learn... there is no other answer.

i'm afraid to live my life, afraid to make mistakes and not be able to take them back. afraid to change irreversibly and have regrets.

i can't love you and be afraid of tomorrow or what if. i can only do either or. up until this point i've only lived the or. its very lonely. its very selfish, very broken and interrupted. i pick up and go when the going gets tough because i'm afraid. afraid to lose. ironically, all the things i've lost in life, i've lost to that fear. you have to bet big to win big, and i'm betting on you.

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